Sometimes when you reach these milestones, the leader asks you to share some secrets of your success with the other people at the meeting. Well, the leader instead asked me how I felt, to which I replied "100% better than the first time I walked in here," but because I knew she might ask, I had been thinking about the secrets to my success.
The biggest secret, and one of the things that has made weight loss "click" for me this time around, is simply choosing to believe that people around you are going to be supportive of your efforts. In the past, I had more or less kept weight loss attempts a secret from friends and even my family. Even if I did tell them, if they forgot I was trying to "be good" and suggested we, for instance, go grab a burger, I would sigh and go along, and think to myself, "I might as well just ruin myself, it's impossible to do this if no one is willing to support me." I just assumed that they were either trying to sabotage me on purpose or didn't care enough about me to remember that I was trying to make healthier choices. Then I would feel angry and resentful, and those feelings affected my food choices (side of mayonnaise to dip my large order of fries? yes please!) I never spoke up because was much easier to just let them enable me. Plus, let's be honest, I probably just wanted an excuse to eat the burger. This time I chose to really stand up for myself, advocate for my own success, and choose to believe that they are neither annoyed nor inconvenienced by my choices. And what do you think has happened? Friends and family have not only been accomodating of my need to make healthier choices, but they've started to choose healthier meals and activities when we spend time together before I even have the chance to remind them.
Another reason I never asked for or expected support was because I felt shame about needing to lose weight. My mother and my sister are both thin and gorgeous, and even though they've both struggled with their weight at times, they've mostly (in my estimation, at least) come out on top. And my friends, well...for some reason or another I always tend to surround myself with slim, fit, beautiful girls who make it all look effortless. But even those girls, if I'm being honest with myself, WORK for it: my mom, my sister, all the fabulous girls I hang out with, they have gym memberships, run marathons, do triathlons, hit up barre classes and yoga for fun on the weekends, hit the treadmill after a long day of work, and are usually conscious about what they eat. Some of them are, perhaps, naturally thinner than I am, but the point is that they still put in the effort. I have no reason to believe they would have anything but love and encouragement for me if I admitted I was trying to do the same. Which is exactly what has happened over these past few months: they've been nothing but supportive and nonjudgmental.
So back to the 10% key chain With all these things in mind, I decided to go really public with yesterday's milestone: I posted this picture on facebook, with a caption explaining what it signifies (though I didn't specify actual numbers).
I was nervous about putting this out there for all my ex-boyfriends and frenemies to see, but you know what? I got more "likes" for this photo than almost anything else I've ever posted, and lots of them from people I wouldn't have expected to pay one bit of attention.
And that, my friends, is what solidified my decision to start this blog. To share my struggles with people who might feel encouraged, but more than that, to call in the love and support of the Universe at large and I trudge forward on this journey. Because I can't do it alone.
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